Saturday, May 31, 2003
"No, don't tell me there's three." -Maria Deluca Today was my mom's (first) graduation at Cal State. It was pretty nice. The graduation speeches were really good. One girl was crying throughout her whole speech. It was very touching.
This was sort of a first grad for me too, except for my cousin's high school graduation (but I was too young to realize what was going on). There were maybe only 30-40 graduates. It was only for her department-Urban Learning.
They did a power point presentation that was okay at first but then it became "The Neverending Story". It was presentation of pictures of the two cohorts. It was nice and maybe if I was the one graduating (and knew the people) I would have liked it more.
This was only one out of her two graduations. The next one is June 14. The same day as Bebi's party. I have a feeling I'm not even going to ask my parents if I can go. Before it would have been OK because my mom was going to take the RICA (test) but now she isn't. So like we have the whole day to celebrate. What am I gonna do? I am going to ask my mom on her graduation day if I can go to my friend's party? It's just like saying, "I don't care about you". I told Bebi the only way I can go is if I get there at 9. But even then I'll feel completely guilty. I don't know what to do.
Now you're probably wondering what Maria's quote has to do with this post. At the graduation there was a mariachi band. At first when I saw the 3 guys in the band, I just thought there was something uncanny about them. My brother asked me, "Why do they all look the same?"
"Because they're related." I answered.
"Oh," he said. Then I looked at them again.
They were triplets.
It was funny because they all had different hair styles. Two of them had straight hair but one had it pulled back and the other had it split in the middle. The third one had curly hair. They also had different facial hair (haha). One of them had no facial hair whatsoever. The second one (with the split hair) had some facial hair but not a lot-maybe just like mustache. The third one had a lot of facial hair. My mom took a picture with the band so maybe I'll post it someday.
We still need to go out to dinner. We're probably going to Home Town
Buffet. That's when my dad's going to give my mom the gold apple necklace with diamonds in it! (yay! -I hope she likes it). We just came back home because my mom needed to do her homework. I should be doing my homework too but I'm lazy. I was supposed to read 40 pages of
Catch-22 yesterday, but instead I was just online.
Yesterday, while chatting to Dineli & making the new buffy banner (to your left) and while making my 100x35 button I was thinking of lines. Quotes from Buffy. Then I thought of "Cookie Dough."
"I'm cookie dough. I'm not done baking. I'm not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I'm going to turn out to be. If I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing and maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready. I'm cookies. And then you know if I want someone to eat--or enjoy warm, delicious cookie me, then that's fine. That'll be then. When I'm done." -Buffy Summers
That's why I decided to rename this blog "Cookie Dough". Because like Buffy, I'm still growing and changing and becoming...me. I'm not cookies yet and it'll be a long time until I'm done.
-
Friday, May 30, 2003
"I just feel like everything is passing by me." -Maria DeLuca It's Buffy's fault.
She just let Spike destroy the Hellmouth. No more Sunnydale. So...Guess who's moving to Cleveland?
I'm in a state of blahness. I tried describing this to Bebi and she said the word
blah has different meanings. Well, to me it just means that I don't really care about anything. I feel like nothing is important and I have nothing to look forward to anymore (cept my mom's grad manana). I think this feeling started in first period. I got a B on my Calculus dictionary. I'm sure you're saying:
Oh, my god. She's crazy! But ummm...yeah. Now I just feel like a damn failure. And it doesn't help that I have to do a stupid Calc calendar that needs to be "creative". *Sigh*
Anyways...
Actually right now my blahness feeling is somewhat going away, but not entirely. I'm talking to Jess (haven't spoken to her in a month) and listening to my Roswell Season 3 collection. (Right now: Ivy - "Edge of the Ocean") . . . (k now its Frou Frou --who doesn't love Frou Frou? :D )
Now I'm listening to South -"Paint the Silence".
If you don't luv that song, then there's something wrong with you.
-
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
"Why does life have to be so wrong? Why does everything have to be a lie?" -Alex Whitman I feel really bad. My mom told me that my dad got busted at his work. They totally screwed him over. It wasn't even his fault, his supervisors jsut picked on him. It isn't fair. They even threatened to fire him. That's whats really scaring me. He's under a total amount of pressure right now and I have no idea what to do.
-
